When born a preemie baby is usually place in the NICU. This period can be a difficult time for parents.

Below is a list of things to do doing the times you are separated from your new born baby.

Tips for Coping with Separation from Your Baby

• Find a way to celebrate your baby’s birth, some parents of preemies say it helps to start a baby book or album, to shop for baby clothes, or to decorate the nursery
• Inform people of the birth, send out notification cards and share your joys and sorrows as you choose, this can be a good opportunity to welcome and show your love for your baby
• Do what feels right for you. Spend as much time as you want or can with your preemie. Don’t be made to feel guilty or let others tell you what you should and shouldn’t be doing
• Keep a journal of your baby’s expressions, things they like and dislike, and little characteristics that show their own unique personality. This can be a great way to learn a lot about your preemie and can be very valuable information for medical staff who may not understand your baby’s body language as well as you
• Try to learn more about your delivery. Ask your partner, nurses and doctors for details or you might want to know why things were done a particular way. This can help you recover emotionally and also fill in any gaps in your story you can’t remember or didn’t understand
• Talk about your delivery and your premature baby. It is healing to tell your story. Keeping a journal or baby book, or chatting to people on forums can also help
• Take photos regularly, it can be a great way of keeping track of your baby’s development, changes in appearance, and progress in health and strength.
• Some parents find it therapeutic to write little notes to their baby that express their love, thoughts, hopes and desires
• Leave notes at baby’s bedside for Caregivers and visitors, to remind them of any special needs or preferences your prem has (link to downloaded posters)
• Leave reminders for Caregivers to wait for you to arrive if you plan to be there for any special reason, like feedings, bath time, helping with care giving
• You might like to ask your baby’s primary nurse to leave you notes” from baby’s point of view”, describing any new developments or condition changes
• Express breast milk if you can, it can make you feel more maternal. Even if baby isn’t ready, pumping and storing is a way to make you feel you are planning for time when your prem is ready
• Place an item of your clothing in the incubator, perhaps a nightie or T-shirt you’ve worn for a couple of nights. Your scent can be of comfort to your baby
• Take something home that has your baby’s scent on it, some parents say smelling it helps them feel close to their baby
• Record yourself reading, singing or talking softly and leave in the NICU so baby can listen to it when you are not there
• Some parents buy a special piece of jewellery or object to celebrate the early arrival of their preemie baby
• Protect and welcome your new baby in ways that are important for you and your family